Because we had a crappy yesterday. And I am ridiculous

If you were a pumpkin
And I was a carving knife
I’d cut out happy faces
On the canvas of your life

Because we had a crappy yesterday. And I am ridiculous

If you were a pumpkin
And I was a carving knife
I’d cut out happy faces
On the canvas of your life

I am adding doctors to the list of people I hate.

Yes, some doctors do great and amazing things save lives, blah blah blah, but let's face it….much like teachers and policemen, a noticeable portion of them just don't give a shit.

I won't go to the doctor for hardly anything. If you know me, you know I will do almost anything before actually paying someone to look at what's wrong with me. I haven't been to the doctor (yearly pelvic exams aside) since I had an ingrown toenail removed in the emergency room when I was 12.

I've had a horrible stabbing pain around/near my left tonsil for 8 days now. I started out annoying, then got downright painful. It feels like strep, it hurts worse with acidic foods, only really hurts when I swallow or yawn. It's not the constant ache that precedes a cold—this is a sharp pain, but it is only on the left side.

So, on day 5 of this, I went to a reputable Walk-In clinic to get tested for strep, which can turn deadly if left unchecked. The test came back negative. I told the doctor it was very painful and was concerned because it had persisted but she said just take a couple days off work and it should clear up on its own.

I was hurried out the door fairly quickly by an assistant, not given the time to really ask any questions. Take off work? That's your fucking answer? If I could afford to take a couple days off work for a sore throat, you think I'd be visiting your quack ass in a walk in clinic?! So I paid 50 bucks for some tart to spin me around and send me back out the door. I do not shake sticks at 50 bucks. 50 bucks is a big deal to me. That's a week and a half of gas or groceries. That's more than my cell bill. 50 bucks for nothing. Poof. Gone. Vanished.

Next time there is something wrong with me, and you fuckers are urging me to go to the doctor and I am making excuses not to, or saying they just won't help—just take my word for it. Once they've got your money, what do they care if they actually help you or not? I've seen guys with scraped elbows walk out fo that place with an armful of prescription, and they wouldn't even give me cautionary antibiotics? REALLY?

So, Day 8 of throat pain is half over, and I have seen no reduction in it yet. It's hurts as bad as it did a week ago. I've taken nearly 8 ibuprofin a day for over a week, which is horrible for ones body…the painkillers aren't really helping any more at all, and chloraseptic isn't doing the trick. And if I go into a yawning fit? Forget about it.

Fuck.

The more I think about it the angrier I get.

Most anyone who has lived in a co-ed household of any sort is familiar with the kind of anger incurred when a woman enters her bathroom to discover urine anywhere on, around, or about the toilet. In fact, this is something men catch a lot of hell for. If you can’t keep from leaking all over the seat, lift it—if you make a mess, sop it up. Not a hard concept to grasp. We are all familiar with this cliché, are we not? My irritation, however, is not directed at men at the moment. I am fortunate to be with a man who leaves no trace of himself in our bathroom when it comes to bodily fluids.
What most of you men probably do not know is that this horribly unsanitary act is not limited to the gender with flailing phalluses attached to their lower quarters.
Nearly every time I enter a public restroom (and I do so as rarely as possible these days)—it does not matter how nice the establishment may be—I find urine splashed on the toilet seat in women’s restrooms. Women who “hover” do so because they are too squeamish to sit on the seat… but it is hovering women WHO ARE PISSING ALL OVER THE SEATS TO BEGIN WITH. So if you’d stop hovering, you’d stop peeing on the seat, and then the tissue paper seat guard provided to you in most public rest rooms could actually serve its purpose --and you would negate the need to hover in the first place. You women who hover, you are propagating this problem, am I am embarrassed on your behalf.
Please, use your damn brains ladies. Don’t abide a senseless idiosyncrasy because of some ill conceived notion that it is more hygienic. That’s bullshit. Do nothing without an understanding of why it is you’re doing it. Act with a purpose.

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This shit makes me so goddamn angry I could VOMIT. What the fuck is wrong with Americans that they think they NEED another animals breast milk to survive?? Do you honestly believe that lactation from a cow is necessary to human survival? Are you fucking kidding me?

You want to know what that is? It’s the USDA and its affiliates freaking out that people are cutting back the purchases on their product in droves, for plenty of good reasons too. Hormones are not even half of the things wrong with the milk we drink, and it is far more unhealthy and fattening (skim or not!) than it is beneficial. All the nutrients in milk that this so called “food pyramid” says we need can be found in non-animal products. It is absolutely ludicrous to believe that without nutrients intended for newborn calves (NOT HUMANS) we would simply wither and die, or else leave irreparably unhealthy lives.

Never forget that the USDA is a business, and they’re number one priority is not your health, it is profit.

If the United States government was so concerned about your health and what we put in our bodies, do you think America would be the most unhealthy and obese nation in the world? Don’t give me that “freedom of choice” bullshit either, our government should not even be giving us the option of destroying ourselves via chemically altered and completely nutrient deficient garbage, while simultaneously failing to provide it’s people with proper information about what we’re actually consuming. It’s bad enough that they present us with this poison they try to pass off as food, but to lie and mislead it’s people, and not even give them the chance to make their own choices? It’s fucked up. Truly. If you research it, you’ll find that very few countries in the world even consume milk at all, from any animal. It is absurd to drink bovine breast milk!! Can you believe so many Americans have been absolutely convinced that they need it? Think about it, people. There are lots of nutrients in human breast milk too, meant for helping babies grow, can you imagine pumping humans for your cereal in the morning, or baking some nice sweet human juice into your birthday cake? No? THEN WHY IS A COW ANY DIFFERENT?! And if that human juice had been pumped from infected oozing nipples, from a body coursing with hormones and antibiotics? That’s crazy right? So why do we continue to chug cows milk like it is our existence depends on it? Give me a break.

Remember, it’s all a business. Your health is not Priority Number One--turning a buck is. And they won’t shape up, up the standards, or clean up their acts until they get caught doing something blatantly unhealthy or stupid and then someone can actually prove it (before it gets covered up or swept under the rug). They will get away with feeding you whatever they can for as long as they can, because there is gooood money when you bank on someone’s ignorant taste buds.

Know what you’re putting in your body, and educate yourself for christ’s sake. America might give you the freedom to be a complete fucking jackass, but please, try to rise above it if you can.